Are you sitting down?  Go ahead, I’ll wait. Okay, here goes – I, Zolligirl, am bona fide! Yes, Dear Readers, I have in my hot, little E-mail, an actual contract from a LITERARY AGENT! An real-live person has read my book and wants to represent me! And it’s a real person at a real agency, not some fly-by-night scam artist from Nigeria who needs to me deposit a large sum of money into their account first!

So here’s a THANK YOU to all the little people who helped me along the way.

And by “helped”, I mean provided inspiration for all my wacky characters. Expect no royalties.

I haven’t posted lately about my endeavors to be a PUBLISHED author, so I thought I’d give you a quick update. Where were we? Oh yeah, two agents had requested my manuscript, given it high praise, but REJECTED it. Sure they had both offered to read it again with revision, but they weren’t falling over themselves to have me sign on the dotted line. I REALLY want to sign on the dotted line!

Just as I was beginning to revise, a third agent requested the manuscript. I sent it, then decided to wait on revision. What if she likes it, but ALSO had revision ideas? So I wrote a few short stories and plotted out my second novel. When I hadn’t heard back from anyone, I figured no news was good news.

Turns out no news is just no news. I finally emailed to ask if they had read it and it seems it got LOST in the shuffle. Sigh. The good news is that they did ask for it again, so I should know something soon. AND the agent profile is very promising.

I’ll let you know when I know something. Until then, I’ll just keep plugging away at my new book. I’m actually being productive. Public School is AWESOME!

A few months ago an agent asked for my entire manuscript. I still have not heard from them.

Wow, that was riveting. Can I tell a story or WHAT? Because I’m on hold, I’ve stopped revising and have moved on with a new manuscript. So far, I’ve got the title and first chapter. It’s called, “A Girl’s Guide to Bass Fishing and Murder.”

You might want to pre-order now and avoid the long lines.

Just a quick update on the writing. I know I have another blog where I’m supposed to put this, but no one ever checks there. Hey, no one ever checks HERE, but what the heck.

I got a response to a query today that I sent out SEPTEMBER 17th. I had sent them a brief synopsis and the first chapter and today they asked for the entire manuscript. Well, ACTUALLY, a reader for the agency asked for the manuscript. But here’s the totally awesome part – on the email exchange between the agency and the hired reader  - the agency wrote this:

MG but solid writing

MG means middle grade vs. young adult. And solid writing means I ROCK! I write SOLIDLY. How cool is that? Oh, what am I talking about? You’re readers, you already know this!

So, ummm…why hasn’t anyone mentioned it before??

I started ANOTHER blog. I thought I’d separate my writing posts from my family posts in case an agent stumbled upon this blog and became frightened by my stories of vodka and large butts. You can see it HERE.

It won’t be updated everyday like this one, and will be about my humiliating attempts to make it in the publishing world, vs. my humiliating attempts at everything else. Still, between the two, I should be able to document them all.

You ARE required to visit both – I need the stats. But you are still NOT required to actually read anything I write. Since I only average about 5 comments a week, I suppose we can do without any rules governing those. Two blogs for the price of one – enjoy!

I mentioned last week that an agent requested my entire manuscript. Actually, she said my first 10 pages were ADORABLE, and she wanted my manuscript. Sorry to repeat myself, I just wanted to make sure you got that part. About my first 10 pages. Being ADORABLE.

Anyway, when I saw her name in my email inbox today, I wasn’t thrilled. I’ve heard that agents/editors/publishers send letters with bad news, but will CALL you with good news. Turns out, I’m still hanging in there!

Lisa,

Thanks so much for sending this along. I’m traveling this week and, since we’re coming up on Thanksgiving, it’ll take me a little while to read. I apologize for that delay but I really am looking forward to digging in.

Mary Kole

Whew. Waiting to find out if someone wants your book is hard. But I’ve been interested in seeing how another writer handled the unveiling of  her debut book. Sarah Palin seems to be doing okay with the whole agent/book publishing business. So I’m wondering….

Do you think I’ll get my bus BEFORE or after the book is published?

I know that 98% of my readership tune in each day to A) see pictures of  the Moonpie, or B) hear stories about the MoonPie, and I do have some new ones. But they’re going to have to wait. I mentioned yesterday that an AGENT requested the first 10 pages of my novel. Today, she responded with this:

Lisa,

I adored the first 10 pages. If you could slip me the full manuscript as a Word doc attachment, I’d love to keep reading.

Thanks!
Mary Kole

She ADORED it. My first 10 pages are ADORABLE. So instead of spending the last few hours editing MoonPie and her latest cool endeavors, I’ve been re-editing my novel to send today. How exciting is that? If she finds the OTHER 260 pages adorable, we’re good to go. You know me. I can do adorable for long stretches, right?

Never mind. I promise that tomorrow, we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled programming. And it will even  include bears.

Last week I posted about a Query Contest. I didn’t really expect anyone to run out and WRITE a query, but one of the requirements of the contest was to POST about it on your blog. (For those who haven’t spent hours sweating over a query – it’s basically a letter that says, Hey – my book is about this – want to read it? Sometimes agents ask for a synopsis or chapters, but a LOT of the time – the letter is your only shot.)

Anyway, I submitted my query, and did not win. Not an honorable mention, not third place, not second, not first, not the Grand Prize – nothing, nada, zip. BUT. Today I got this email:

Lisa,

Thank you so much for entering the query contest and sharing your work with me. Though I didn’t choose your query for the contest, the premise of your project sounded very interesting. If you’d like to submit a writing sample for my consideration, go ahead and paste the first 10 pages in a response to me, I’d love to take a look.

Thanks,
Mary Kole

Do you know what this means? IF this goes anywhere, it will be the first time this BLOG has helped me in any way whatsoever! And it only took a year of daily posts. Awesome.

I admit it, when Emily the agent decided not to read my entire manuscript, I was a little upset. Okay, I’ve been moping around the house for a week. BUT, I did manage to get out a few more queries. I can’t decide if I’m an optimist or a masochist. Whatever. Today, I got a nibble -

Dear Ms. Tyre:

Thank you for your query. I’m intrigued. Please send the first 75 pages via post.

Kind regards,

Tina

I’m sure to get a rejection in a few weeks, but today, I’m BRILLIANT. Of course, she’ll hate it. But what if she LOVES it? Who am I kidding? But what IF??

Seriously, does anyone have a xanax?

Because I’m so good at them, I’m entering a contest. If you write, check it out here. If not, why do YOU get a life without rejection? C’mon, get in the game!